(no subject)
Feb. 15th, 2026 01:09 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
southernmedicineY'all, I was too confident.
I was on top of the world after absolutely killing Blair's birthday. Downright cocky. As I left for work this morning, I left a big vase of beautiful flowers, a card, and chocolates on the kitchen counter for Blair to find when she woke up. I was sure I was still winning, eager to come home and give her the two gifts I'd gotten her - the ring and the [REDACTED].
I was much too confident.
I come home, hear music. Venture down the hall into the kitchen, and find the vase I left plus another vase of red roses, a heart shaped candle burning, a dish with a chocolate covered red velvet bundt cake and a pair of forks, two crystal decanters, several wrapped presents, and red rose petals everywhere.
I peek into the bedroom to look for Blair and see the bed has been stripped down to just the bottom sheet and covered in rose petals, all our favorite [REDACTED] lined up in a neat row on the night stand.
What a Dark Horse. She is not the sort to really go all out with gift giving, and planning/orchestrating this sort of stuff just isn't her bag. But somehow! Somehow, she did this, and it was incredible. This sort of thing has never happened to me before. What she wrote in the card made me cry. I've never felt so loved and cherished.
We went out for dinner at a local Indian place, and it was wonderful. At home we had wine, ate the bundt cake, and [REDACTED] with the [REDACTED] we got at the local [REDACTED] downtown.
Oh, man.
I hope y'all had a lovely Valentine's Day, or a wonderful Saturday if you don't observe the commercial love holiday.
I was on top of the world after absolutely killing Blair's birthday. Downright cocky. As I left for work this morning, I left a big vase of beautiful flowers, a card, and chocolates on the kitchen counter for Blair to find when she woke up. I was sure I was still winning, eager to come home and give her the two gifts I'd gotten her - the ring and the [REDACTED].
I was much too confident.
I come home, hear music. Venture down the hall into the kitchen, and find the vase I left plus another vase of red roses, a heart shaped candle burning, a dish with a chocolate covered red velvet bundt cake and a pair of forks, two crystal decanters, several wrapped presents, and red rose petals everywhere.
I peek into the bedroom to look for Blair and see the bed has been stripped down to just the bottom sheet and covered in rose petals, all our favorite [REDACTED] lined up in a neat row on the night stand.
What a Dark Horse. She is not the sort to really go all out with gift giving, and planning/orchestrating this sort of stuff just isn't her bag. But somehow! Somehow, she did this, and it was incredible. This sort of thing has never happened to me before. What she wrote in the card made me cry. I've never felt so loved and cherished.
We went out for dinner at a local Indian place, and it was wonderful. At home we had wine, ate the bundt cake, and [REDACTED] with the [REDACTED] we got at the local [REDACTED] downtown.
Oh, man.
I hope y'all had a lovely Valentine's Day, or a wonderful Saturday if you don't observe the commercial love holiday.
(no subject)
Feb. 13th, 2026 01:36 pmsouthernmedicineBlair's birthday went off perfectly.
The minute she left for class I got my ass in gear making her cake. A copycat (or closest approximation I could find) of Trader Sam's coconut cake, the cake we had at Disneyland that she said was her new favorite cake. I made my own letters out of melted chocolate in a silicone mold (Happy Name Day), and used a hunk of rock candy to represent a kyber crystal. Painted the crystal and the letters with edible UV luster dust to make them glow, which she was absolutely enchanted by, to my pride and delight.
Drove her downtown and walked to the secret location where the rage vault is located, which was her surprise birthday activity. She's been mentioning how the state of the world has been making her feel more fearful, agitated, aggressive, and that she doesn't know where to put these feelings, so this is why I thought this would be a great surprise activity. We were shown to the back where she could select a bunch of protective gear: jumpsuit, eyewear, helmet with visor, gloves, and choose a couple of weapons. She selected baseball bat and crowbar. Then, for twenty minutes, she got to break and assortment of items in that room to a loud aggressive metal soundtrack. It was a sight to behold. They let me go in too, and cower in a little alcove so I could take a few pictures and some video. It was wild standing there watching her go savage, while shards of exploding glass sailed past me (of course I was wearing protective gear too).
Afterward, we walked further downtown to eat at one of her favorite places, a gourmet woodfire pizza place. I sent her to get a table and ordered our pizza, a salad, and a couple of glasses of wine. After that, we headed to The Pearl, the cutest little hometown creamery you ever saw, for some ice cream.
Back home, I made her wait by the door while I arrange everything on the counter. Set the cake out, check. Arrange her gifts and card, check. Make sure 7 foot tall life size cardboard standee of Bode Akuna is in place, check.
She lost her mind over the giant Bode, which is exactly the reaction I wanted. Enjoyed her gifts. Also enjoyed a long shower and the massage that followed. I love a good chance to spoil her, and it was an absolute joy to put a birthday together for her. The first of either of our birthdays that we have been able to spend together in person.
Valentine's Day is tomorrow. I've already gotten a bunch of flowers and arranged them myself in a nice vase, and have wrapped the ring I bought in Washington. I'll leave the flowers on the counter so that she sees them first thing in the morning. I have to work in the morning, but in the evening, we're gonna go and get Indian food. This is also our first Valentine's Day together in person, so I'm excited and happy.
The minute she left for class I got my ass in gear making her cake. A copycat (or closest approximation I could find) of Trader Sam's coconut cake, the cake we had at Disneyland that she said was her new favorite cake. I made my own letters out of melted chocolate in a silicone mold (Happy Name Day), and used a hunk of rock candy to represent a kyber crystal. Painted the crystal and the letters with edible UV luster dust to make them glow, which she was absolutely enchanted by, to my pride and delight.
Drove her downtown and walked to the secret location where the rage vault is located, which was her surprise birthday activity. She's been mentioning how the state of the world has been making her feel more fearful, agitated, aggressive, and that she doesn't know where to put these feelings, so this is why I thought this would be a great surprise activity. We were shown to the back where she could select a bunch of protective gear: jumpsuit, eyewear, helmet with visor, gloves, and choose a couple of weapons. She selected baseball bat and crowbar. Then, for twenty minutes, she got to break and assortment of items in that room to a loud aggressive metal soundtrack. It was a sight to behold. They let me go in too, and cower in a little alcove so I could take a few pictures and some video. It was wild standing there watching her go savage, while shards of exploding glass sailed past me (of course I was wearing protective gear too).
Afterward, we walked further downtown to eat at one of her favorite places, a gourmet woodfire pizza place. I sent her to get a table and ordered our pizza, a salad, and a couple of glasses of wine. After that, we headed to The Pearl, the cutest little hometown creamery you ever saw, for some ice cream.
Back home, I made her wait by the door while I arrange everything on the counter. Set the cake out, check. Arrange her gifts and card, check. Make sure 7 foot tall life size cardboard standee of Bode Akuna is in place, check.
She lost her mind over the giant Bode, which is exactly the reaction I wanted. Enjoyed her gifts. Also enjoyed a long shower and the massage that followed. I love a good chance to spoil her, and it was an absolute joy to put a birthday together for her. The first of either of our birthdays that we have been able to spend together in person.
Valentine's Day is tomorrow. I've already gotten a bunch of flowers and arranged them myself in a nice vase, and have wrapped the ring I bought in Washington. I'll leave the flowers on the counter so that she sees them first thing in the morning. I have to work in the morning, but in the evening, we're gonna go and get Indian food. This is also our first Valentine's Day together in person, so I'm excited and happy.
Words, 2/13
Feb. 13th, 2026 08:43 pmnotfreyja
So library day did happen yesterday, and I managed to get almost 5k words in, which is phenomenal. I started the day still about 8k behind my par line, though which… was not great. I did not harbor any illusions that I would be able to clock the 8k today, but I wanted to make an honest attempt to bridge the gap. Which again, was 2.7 days worth of a gap.
I have also been struggling to find a good balance of drafting versus editing time, so knowing that I am behind on both the word count and posting goal I set for myself is. It is stressful. You know what isn't stressful? Prepping all the materials for Retro Writing May, a new event I started with my friend Tash, and am having a blast typing up a full expository post for every single one of the event prompts.
Which is what I was working on today. I started the day on the write-up for prompt number 14, and ended it on prompt 19. In the middle I fused a bit on various other documents, and then hid under a rock from the finished, but unedited chapter of Snare that I was supposed to post today.
So that's fun.
Regardless, I managed 2,658 words today, bringing our total for the month to 32,951 and our total for the year to 117,206. Is that a lot of words? Yes.
Yeah, that's a lot of fucking words. However, I am still a little bit behind schedule. I am. Staying calm, and working on bridging that gap as best that I can.
Do we think I can make it to ten days ahead of schedule come vacation?
The Million Words Challenge
Feb. 12th, 2026 03:38 pmnotfreyjaHello class, specifically the dreamwidth section. I am, as the above title suggests, in the midst of undertaking a challenge.
I, as you will come to find out if you don't know already, am insane. So in 2026, I have chosen to embark upon a journey of writing one million words in a calendar year. What exactly does that mean?
All non-correspondence writing counts.
For my purposes all of the following will count as words: prose (fan fiction and original works), poetry, academic and administrative work, meta analysis, and these daily update posts, among other words that I see as productive. Basically, anything that would count as words for the LU Community Write-A-Thon. …Almost.
Almost, because as I previously said, I will only be counting non-correspondence writing. This means that I shall not count answering comments on fic or tumblr asks, nor shall I count sending asks nor writing comments on fics. Nor will I count commenting of dreamwidth posts or direct messages of any mind. These are all valuable uses of my time that I will continue to do, but they do not fit into my idea of what a successful completion of this challenge will look like.
As for metrics, and progress tracking, I have to give a huge shout-out to Mina (@zarvasace on Tumblr) for making tools like the personal day and monthly word count trackers (available for download on the LUWAT site) that I then modified to serve my specific use case.
Every day, I shall post an update to the relevant monthly tracker, and optionally the document log which will show what documents I am working on and their current word counts. Each emoji is a different project, and the cases where the same emoji is present in multiple spots with numbers beside it mean that I am references separate chapters of the same project, as I hold those in separate ellipsus drafts.
I shall also be periodically posting an update to this page which concatenates all of my months into one stat page, as you can see below.
(And while those pictures are currently blanks the live documents are not, I will shown you later!)
One million words in a year is a par of 83.3k words a month, or 2,474 words every day. At the time of this post's drafting I am about two days behind schedule exactly, which is really not bad considering I took like half a week off to boot up not only this account but the Retro Writing Month event.
Wish me luck, I'll be back with the day's total as often as I remember to be.
On a Roll For Now and Posting Another Fic - Hope I Can Keep It Up
Feb. 12th, 2026 01:25 amlightbirdTitle/Link: A Place Of Her Own
Fandom: Hey Arnold!
Character(s): Helga Pataki
Rating: G
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
halfamoon prompt: her sanctuary
genprompt_bingo prompt: closets, caves, and other tight spaces
Summary: The walk-in closet was too small to qualify as a separate room, but it was large enough for her to sit comfortably and hide.
Fandom: Hey Arnold!
Character(s): Helga Pataki
Rating: G
halfamoon prompt: her sanctuarygenprompt_bingo prompt: closets, caves, and other tight spacesSummary: The walk-in closet was too small to qualify as a separate room, but it was large enough for her to sit comfortably and hide.
Wednesday What I'm...
Feb. 11th, 2026 11:14 pmreeby10Reading
- I read Lost Boys by Kaname Itsuki, which is a yaoi manga based on Peter Pan. It was... fine, idk. Not as interesting as it looked.
- Ficwise, I'm still bopping between JunDylan and VegasPete and having a good time :) Currently I'm reading a JunDylan fic called Too Aware, Regrettably Aroused by Polikuro. Enjoying it a lot!
- The roommate and I finished Boys in Love. Again, very cute and sweet! Wish PoddPapang would have gotten a bit more screentime, but I really did enjoy all the kids.
- The roommate and I watched The Wicked Game. The quality of this show was pretty garbage, but it was quite fun. I really liked DaouOffroad and I want to see more of them.
- The roommate and I started watching 2gether. Very fun so far! I love some fake dating with one side definitely having feelings and the other too dumb to notice lol
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the latest episode of Cat for Cash. Continues to be very cute.
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the latest episode of Melody of Secrets. They seem to have wrapped everything up with one more episode to go so like... what's gonna happen now??
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the latest episode of Dare You to Death. I am so sure I know who the killer (or one of??) is and I am hype! Also, JoongDunk are so cute.
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the latest episode of My Romance Scammer. Very good! I love that things are already starting to get messy lol
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the latest episode of Duang with You. So silly and fun! Really enjoying TeeteePor.
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the first episode of Yesterday. Interesting so far! I am digging FortPeat's vibe.
- This was the week for new music apparently! There have actually been several others, but these are the ones that have been stuck in my head:
- No Way by LYKN. Very catchy and I love the red velvet suits.
- Bad Boy No "DO" by CLO'VER. Also very catchy and cute.
- My No. 1 Duo by the Gen 5 DMD boys. Again, very catchy lol
- I wrote my Candy Hearts assignment. My first time writing this ship, and I think it came out very well!
- Wrote a little more on a Thundercloud Rainstorm fic.
- Also wrote a poem.
- I did the fourth lesson of Pimsleur's Thai. I'm starting to feel confident about being able to say a few full sentences, so that's nice. There's a couple of phrases I'm really struggling with, but hopefully they'll click eventually...
- Read some more articles about figure skating. There's a couple of books I'd like to read but I'm having a hard time finding copies, so we'll see.
And Another Fic Posted!
Feb. 11th, 2026 03:22 pmlightbirdGo me!
Title/Link: Partners
Fandom: Hey Arnold!
Character(s): Phoebe Heyerdahl, Helga Pataki
Rated: G
halfamoon prompt: the explorer
ladiesbingo prompt: journalist/chronicler
Summary: When Phoebe and Helga decided to collaborate and pool both their talents, they were unstoppable.
Title/Link: Partners
Fandom: Hey Arnold!
Character(s): Phoebe Heyerdahl, Helga Pataki
Rated: G
halfamoon prompt: the explorerladiesbingo prompt: journalist/chroniclerSummary: When Phoebe and Helga decided to collaborate and pool both their talents, they were unstoppable.
Hello again!
Feb. 11th, 2026 01:05 pmnotfreyjaSo after making this account and then never using it again, I have decided to come back. Is this partly about discord going down in flames? Yes. But we're going to be giving it a go. I'll be using this to talk about my writing projects and events I run, as well as occasionally shouting into the void.
We shall see how it works out.
We shall see how it works out.
And I Am On A Roll - Another Fic Post!
Feb. 10th, 2026 02:02 amlightbirdTitle/Link: Playing Dumb
Fandom: Gentlemen Prefer Blondes
Character(s): Dorothy Shaw, Lorelei Lee
Rating: G
halfamoon prompt: acting the fool
ladiesbingo prompt: someone is disguised
genprompt_bingo prompt: protectiveness
Summary: Playing dumb was not Dorothy's style, but desperate times called for desperate measures.
Fandom: Gentlemen Prefer Blondes
Character(s): Dorothy Shaw, Lorelei Lee
Rating: G
halfamoon prompt: acting the foolladiesbingo prompt: someone is disguisedgenprompt_bingo prompt: protectivenessSummary: Playing dumb was not Dorothy's style, but desperate times called for desperate measures.
(no subject)
Feb. 9th, 2026 07:37 pmused_songsIt’s been hectic here.
I’ve been sick as heck with cedar fever. Just miserable enough to want to take off work but not enough to actually do it.
Bad Bunny - what an amazing show!
Ella - she ate a toadstool today and had to go to the emergency vet. She’s ok (she threw it up almost immediately) but she’s very unhappy about having to fast.
Folks who use Discord, are y’all leaving it and if so where are you going? Even if I was cool with providing my ID to use it, I have zero confidence that they would keep my info secure. No other organization seems to be able to.
I guess I will just gradually disappear from the internet as age verification kicks in everywhere. I miss the early, wild days.
I’ve been sick as heck with cedar fever. Just miserable enough to want to take off work but not enough to actually do it.
Bad Bunny - what an amazing show!
Ella - she ate a toadstool today and had to go to the emergency vet. She’s ok (she threw it up almost immediately) but she’s very unhappy about having to fast.
Folks who use Discord, are y’all leaving it and if so where are you going? Even if I was cool with providing my ID to use it, I have zero confidence that they would keep my info secure. No other organization seems to be able to.
I guess I will just gradually disappear from the internet as age verification kicks in everywhere. I miss the early, wild days.
Another Fic Posted!
Feb. 9th, 2026 10:24 amlightbirdTitle/Link: Time Heals
Fandom: Quantum Leap
Character(s): Donna Elesee, Original Female Character
Rating: G
halfamoon prompt: the scholar
ladiesbingo prompt: midnight
genprompt_bingo prompt: eclipses and other astronomical events
Summary: The loneliness and unhappiness she'd felt from his sudden, never-explained leaving had finally dissipated. She only pitied him; he'd missed out on watching his bright daughter grow up to be a brilliant young woman.
Fandom: Quantum Leap
Character(s): Donna Elesee, Original Female Character
Rating: G
halfamoon prompt: the scholarladiesbingo prompt: midnightgenprompt_bingo prompt: eclipses and other astronomical eventsSummary: The loneliness and unhappiness she'd felt from his sudden, never-explained leaving had finally dissipated. She only pitied him; he'd missed out on watching his bright daughter grow up to be a brilliant young woman.
(no subject)
Feb. 9th, 2026 02:34 amsouthernmedicineOh my god. Oh my gooooood.
I have finally finished my fic for my FTH recipient, polished it off, and posted it. It is done. It is done, at long last. I felt so bad for needing an extension, and I was getting so stressed out about it. I hope that my recipient likes it, and I'm just, like, really glad that I can do other stuff now haha. I stopped signing up for things because I needed to spend every spare moment of time and creative energy trying to finish.
I flop now. Bed time. Work tomorrow.
And then: more Olympics!
I have finally finished my fic for my FTH recipient, polished it off, and posted it. It is done. It is done, at long last. I felt so bad for needing an extension, and I was getting so stressed out about it. I hope that my recipient likes it, and I'm just, like, really glad that I can do other stuff now haha. I stopped signing up for things because I needed to spend every spare moment of time and creative energy trying to finish.
I flop now. Bed time. Work tomorrow.
And then: more Olympics!
Fic Posted!
Feb. 8th, 2026 12:28 pmlightbirdSo, further to my post from yesterday, not only did I post the fic, but I managed to flesh it out to over 500 words, so it now qualifies for a fill on both my bingo cards!
Here is the post onhalfamoon.
And on AO3: Baby Sis
Here is the post on
halfamoon.And on AO3: Baby Sis
Tags:
Wednesday What I'm...
Feb. 5th, 2026 11:35 pmreeby10On uhhh almost Friday :D
Reading
Reading
- I read Gakuen Heaven by You Higuri. I've really enjoying some other You Higuri stuff and I feel like this is kind of a yaoi manga classic, but I only found it ok. I'm sure I would have liked it more if I'd read it as a teen lol
- I started reading Demon Fish: Travels Through the Hidden World of Sharks by Juliet Eilperin. I haven't gotten far yet, but I'm intrigued so far. I do love sharks!
- I started listening to Jump the Shark: When Good Things Go Bad by Jon Hein. And DNF'd it at 40%. I thought this would be much more interesting than it was. Part of what made it meh was that I just have not seen much if any of most of the shows he was talking about, but also I just found his opinions questionable. Like sorry not sorry, anyone who talks about TOS Kirk being just a huge playboy is sus in my book.
- Ficwise, I've been alternating between JunDylan and VegasPete. Currently I'm reading a long BDSM club VegasPete fic called Don’t You Care About the Casualties by AnaliseGrey, which is pretty good but they're both a little well adjusted for my tastes.
- The roommate and I finished Dangerous Romance. I liked it a lot! PerthChimon were very cute, but I'm glad that mostly just made me excited to see Chimon with his new partner and not too sad about them no longer being together. Also so intrigued by how PepperPapang could have been...
- The roommate and I started watching Boys in Love. Very cute and sweet! A little too much on the good communication front, which feels a bit weird to say, but I'm loving all the new pairs we're getting to see on this.
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the last episode of Goddess Bless You From Death. Great ending! I love that they wrapped up the spooky stuff and spent the back half of the episode letting PoohPavel be cute together lol
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the latest episode of Cat for Cash. Still very cute. I'm enjoying the shenanigans.
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the latest episode of Melody of Secrets. I didn't think it could get wilder and weirder, but it really did! That is both positive and negative because wow, this show sure is something.
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the last episode of Burnout Syndrome. Things really did go to shit, and I wasn't sure they'd resolve happily, but they did! Overall good, could have used more of Thor though.
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the latest episode of Dare You to Death. I think it's starting to hit its stride more, so I'm enjoying that. Also, some AouBoom, yay!
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the first episode of My Romance Scammer. What a great first episode, like wow! I love that they are speedrunning the get togethers to presumably bring lots of drama very soon lol Looking forward to more.
- The roommate, best friend, and I watched the first episode of Duang with You. Also very good first episode! TeeteePor are so cute. I do feel like this episode covered most of what was in the trailer, so I'm intrigued to see what's going to happen.
- Been doing a lot of listening to my Thai music playlist while I work. I think it really does help me work faster listening to music rather than watching youtube...
- Nothing.
- The roommate and I (who met in college Japanese class!) have decided that we want to brush up our Japanese (which makes it sound like I had much skill back then... I did not lmao), so we are studying back through our textbook. I went through the first chapter, and hey, I am remembering some things!
- I did the third lesson of Pimsleur's Thai. I think I am mostly liking this style! But there are some words that are very hard for me to tell if I'm hearing/saying them correctly. Especially because I'm coming to realize that I kind of literally spell out words in my head when I hear them, so without ever seeing the words spelled, it's a bit frustrating.
(no subject)
Feb. 5th, 2026 10:18 pmsouthernmedicineWinter Olympics Winter Olympics
[vibrates]
Already watching the first women's hockey game, USA vs CZE. Hell yeah Hilary Knight, she's been a hero for so long. Most of the other players on Team USA used to be her fans. This is her fifth time at the Olympics.
Anyway I'm about to be so annoying across social medias.
[vibrates]
Already watching the first women's hockey game, USA vs CZE. Hell yeah Hilary Knight, she's been a hero for so long. Most of the other players on Team USA used to be her fans. This is her fifth time at the Olympics.
Anyway I'm about to be so annoying across social medias.
(no subject)
Feb. 5th, 2026 12:56 amsouthernmedicineSo, today was my appointment with my boss for my employee review. Each of us get pulled into a room, sat down, and engaged in discussion about what we're doing well, what needs improvement, how we're doing numbers-wise, potential raises, ect ect.
I was really nervous. Turns out I didn't need to be, though.
I was told that he hopes I stay a long time, because I've been really wonderful to have on his staff, and he loves me. I'm reliable. He has received not one single complaint about me, and in fact, has heard only nice things from both clients and staff. My retention is great; people keep re-booking with me, and my schedule is always full. He says I appear very laid-back, with a good attitude and a personality that is a great match for the business.
Re: areas that could use improvement, he said that as of that moment he could genuinely not think of anything. Even though I've only been there around five months, I'm getting a modest raise and a cut of the year-end staff bonus as a reward for doing so great, even though part-timers like me don't usually get a year-end bonus.
I'm over the moon. It totally set the tone for me to be in a great mood for the rest of my shift. I expected to go in there and be blindsided by all kinds of things I wasn't doing well enough, so to hear that I'm appreciated and that my good work is being noticed was just a really nice feeling.
I was really nervous. Turns out I didn't need to be, though.
I was told that he hopes I stay a long time, because I've been really wonderful to have on his staff, and he loves me. I'm reliable. He has received not one single complaint about me, and in fact, has heard only nice things from both clients and staff. My retention is great; people keep re-booking with me, and my schedule is always full. He says I appear very laid-back, with a good attitude and a personality that is a great match for the business.
Re: areas that could use improvement, he said that as of that moment he could genuinely not think of anything. Even though I've only been there around five months, I'm getting a modest raise and a cut of the year-end staff bonus as a reward for doing so great, even though part-timers like me don't usually get a year-end bonus.
I'm over the moon. It totally set the tone for me to be in a great mood for the rest of my shift. I expected to go in there and be blindsided by all kinds of things I wasn't doing well enough, so to hear that I'm appreciated and that my good work is being noticed was just a really nice feeling.